Progression slow but sure

Today Val fixed fish, squash and rice. What a treat! I was able to eat a little. It tasted wonderful. I really appreciate the ability to eat, even though I am on a soft-food diet. I never appreciated that before, but, it really is a pleasure to have tasty things in my mouth. I still have to be careful not to eat too much at a time. 1/2 to 1 cup of food at a time is about all my stomach will hold at one time, but it is better than not being able to have anything at all. Eventually my stomach will hold more, I hope. I assume that on Tuesday when I call Dr. Ott, he will give me the go-ahead to have a full diet. It seems to have taken a long time, but, as I actually eat, the time is erased and it is as though I have always been able to eat.

I actually went for two weeks without throwing up. That is the first time in a year that I have accomplished that fete. I really am progressing all the time. I feel almost normal, except for having the feeding tube in my abdomen. When that finally comes out, I'm sure that it will be as if it never happened. Our minds are great to erase the caustic feelings...or is it that I am just getting old and the short term memory is the first thing to go?

This Memorial Day Weekend helps me appreciate what so many have done to allow us the freedom we enjoy. We plan to take a little trip to the cemeteries where our loved ones are buried to pay our respect. We have been blessed with so much!

Getting Better Every Day

I have really appreciated Val keeping up the blog so faithfully. I have just taken it so for granted that I ought to be chastised. However, I am feeling so much better that I should take some responsibility for this myself.

I appreciate those of you who faithfully follow my progress. It means a lot to me to know that you are out there and care what is happening. I feel the support that you give in your thoughts, faith and prayers in my behalf.

I continue to get better all of the time. I am feeling almost normal. The feeding tube is the last big hurdle to overcome. I hope that it can be removed in a short amount of time. We have scheduled flights to Spokane, San Diego, and Phoenix, in a couple of weeks to attend the graduation exercises for some of our grandchildren. I would like to be off the feeding tube by then, but that probably won't happen. We will just have to take all the apparatus with us in our luggage.

I am not on solid foods as yet, but my capacity to take fluids is improving. I will not every be able to eat big amounts of food at a time because of the size of my stomach now. I am thankful that I can see progress. I truly appreciate the Lord's blessings as He continues to heal me.

Thanks again for your loving support!

Slowly but Surely

Mom is doing better with her eating. Yesterday she was able to eat/drink 2 cups of liquids. Today she ate/drank 2 1/2. Everything is staying down and she is feeling really well. The weather has made it difficult to go on walks so she has gone to the gym to walk around the track to build her strength.
Today she again attended all three hours of church. She doesn't sleep during the day because she worries she won't be able to sleep at night. Last week she ended up having a couple of days where she slept well throughout the night, but those times are not common. Even though she doesn't take a nap, she just doesn't sleep. She's not on any medication but Prilosec, so there aren't any chemicals keeping her up. Maybe it's from her stay at the hospital, the staff there certainly doesn't let their patients sleep through the night. :) Hopefully her body will figure it out soon and she'll be able to get the rest she needs to heal properly.

True confessions

Mom has enjoyed being able to put something in her mouth again. Although, we think she has gone a little bonkers. First it was the watermelon, because it had "water" in the name she figured it was ok. But, then came the Sun Chips, the Costco samples (which included a small portion of a Philly Steak Sandwich) and some Macadamia nuts to top it off. Now mind you, she only ate small portions, but STILL! Things stayed down pretty well, until she tried to sleep at night. As she laid down, she started to feel it. In the morning, she threw everything up! She then had to tell her doctor what she had done. After she had confessed all, Dr Ott (a bishop), said, "Well, I still think you're a good person. What you've done isn't really a "moral" sin." He then explained how the breads, even though they are soft are really hard to digest. He asked her to stay on an all liquid diet for a while. Before she can add solids, she needs to be able to have at least 6 cups of liquids a day. Right now she can only do 1 1/2 cups. She told Dr. Ott she would do better. After she hung up with him, she realized she had forgotten to tell him about the chest pains she had had the night before. So, she called him back. When he answered the phone, instead of saying hello, he said, "Do you have more to confess?". It's great to have a doctor with a bit of a sense of humor. :) When she told him about her symptoms he said he didn't think it was her heart. It was probably just the food she had eaten.
Mom didn't really want me to post this, but I do for two reasons. One is to show, she really is human. She has been absolutely perfect in following her doctor's orders until now. I'm not sure how she did it. This time, however, she felt much so much better than she had before. So, she did all of this with a mischievous twinkle in her eye, truly thinking she was totally healed and she would prove to everyone it was all fine. Second, to remind us all of what she has had to deal with. She has been having problems eating for close to a year now. Never knowing if the food she ate would stay down or come back up. And, for close to 2 months, she has not been able to put food in her mouth at all other than those few times where she could take a few sips of something here and there. Living in a society where eating is such a social thing... we eat when we get together with friends, when we celebrate, we give food to comfort those in mourning, to help those who are sick. When we want to help, the first think we ask is "what can I get you?" Although mom is not able to participate in any of those social norms, she doesn't let it keep her down. It can feel very lonely to be in a midst of people and not be able to participate yet she allows everyone else to live their lives without guilt. She has been stalwart in her attitude and her compassion to others in making them feel all is well. I admire her strength, courage and her dedication to get through this. Even though I gave her some very dirty looks about her eating activities this week, she is still my hero.

Try, try again

Mom has been feeling pretty well for the past few days. Dr. Ott called today to check on her. He said since she hadn't thrown up in over a week and a half, she could start drinking clear fluids again. She has to take it slow and if she throws up at all, she will have to stop again. Today, she had some juice, some bullion, and somehow snuck in a little bit of watermelon. She figured since it had "water" in the name, she'd be OK. We'll see if it really is OK.
Until last night, she had been sleeping better, but last night she had some issues with her feeding tube that kept her up most of the night. Hopefully she's fixed the problem so she can get some rest tonight.

The healing continues

Mom has continued to feel improvement in her health and energy. With her doctor's permission, she has upped the rate of her tube feed so she can get it all done in just under 14 hours instead of 16. Although the tube feeding still takes more than 1/2 of a 24 hour day, she has decided to make it work around her schedule rather than her working around it; It just takes some planning. She was able to attend the temple Saturday night with our ward by starting earlier in the afternoon, unhooking for a few hours, then hooking back up when she got home.
She attended all 3 hours of church yesterday. Although it would probably behoove her to take a nap sometime during the day, she usually doesn't. She has had a difficult time sleeping at night. She can feel that she's tired, but sleep just hasn't come easily. Before she hooked up for the night last night, she went on a walk to the park. When she started these walks, she would have to stop and catch her breath about 1/2 way. When we arrived at the park, she would sit for 15 - 20 min or so before going back home. Now, she walks at a faster rate and doesn't stop for a break at all. In fact, instead of just walking to and from the park she also takes a lap around it as well, making it closer to a mile and a half instead of just a mile.

Feeling a lot better

Mom woke up this morning feeling much better. The flu symptoms were gone, thankfully. She went on a walk, spent some time outside and she got her quilt blocks sewn together. It should be done before too long (just in time to start another one) Tonight when i came home from work, she was already hooked up to her feeding tube and looked a little tired. But, when she spoke, I could tell she felt a lot better. She had a strength in her voice I hadn't heard in a long time. She seemed to have a little more vigor in her step tonight as well. Hopefully this will become the norm, instead of a rarity, as she continues to heal and get stronger.

The iron infusion

Mom's energy is improving little by little but the docs wanted to boost her iron levels because she's still anemic. She can't take the iron by mouth and taking it thru the feeding tube won't work because it wouldn't get to her stomach. The only option left is to have it done by infusion. One person said it would take a couple of hours, another said it would probably be more like five hours. Mom's appointment today was at 9 am. She just had to sit there in a chair while they intravenously fed her the iron. They also gave her Benadryl in her IV as well. Six and a half hours later she was finally done and totally wiped out physically. They said over the next 48 hours she should probably take some tylenol because she may experience flu like symptoms. The good effects of the iron most likely won't be felt for two to four weeks.

Gaining strength

Mom has been doing well, She has been staying healthy and trying to exercise every day. Dr Ott upped her calorie intake last week (adding an additional can per day to go into her feeding tube). He also said it was OK to up the rate so she can get all 7 cans done in just under 16 hours ( it was 16 hours for 6 cans before). She had an appointment with the nutritionalist today and has an appointment to have some iron infused tomorrow. Hopefully this will improve her energy level. I get the impression, knowing she is not allowed to eat anything for a month has taken away some of the pressure. She can allow her body to heal on it's own without feeling she is failing at the healing process because her food isn't staying down.
Dad had his visit with the cardiologist today. Mom and dad both liked him and he put them at ease as far as dad's health is concerned. Dad's cholesterol is a little high (not horrible), so he will be doing things to help that come down. Dad still has to go back for some other tests as well as a stress test.

Perfect Mother's Day/Birthday

It has been a wonderful day today. I was presented with a book of pictures and letters from each of our children and most of our grandchildren. My heart was full as I read each letter. What a difference it makes to feel the gratitude of others. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!!!

I have resigned myself to being grateful for small things: Dr. Ott mentioned that I could either have surgery this week, and in a month I would be feeling as good as I am feeling now, or I could just stay on the feeding tube for a month without taking food or drink by mouth for a month, and I will probably be healed enough in a month to be able to eat again. I truly have to be grateful for the feeding tube that keeps me alive while I heal. Sometimes I feel like complaining that I have it, but truly it is saving my life.

I appreciate each of you who are praying for me. I know that the Lord is listening and answering your prayers in my behalf. I am getting stronger all the time. I walk at least a mile per day, and I can tell that my strength is increasing. Please know that I love each of you and appreciate your interest in my welfare.

Back to the drawing board

Mom spoke with Dr. Ott this morning about how things were going. ie, throwing up all day yesterday, her new tube placement hurting so bad she needed pain meds, etc. He asked her to come right in. He was especially concerned about the pain she was experiencing. He did a lot of tests and found no infection. This was good news, and the pain has subsided today. It still hurts, but not as bad as it was yesterday and the day before. She also underwent several other tests and x-rays, including a swallow test. He then compared the results and the images to what they looked like before. He said there is significant improvement in everything. But there is cause for concern because she is not able to hold food down. He gave mom 2 choices. Have surgery now which will correct the problem immediately, but also means she would have to put her body through the shock of major surgery again, a week in the hospital and all the recoup time. So, within a month she would be almost where she is right now. Or, no food for a month, be patient and let her body heal naturally. And, within a month she will be about where she is now as far as eating, but hopefully be further along in the healing process. So, either way, it will be a month before she gets to eat any kind of food or drink. Also, with the surgery she puts herself at other risks and complications which may delay the healing process even more. She decided to be patient. This is what her doctor recommended as well. He said, even though she really wants to get better and eat normally again, eating seems to be impeding the healing process. He really feels, if she goes this next month without taking food orally, she will be better off and her body will have time to heal. It is disappointing to hear we have to start at the beginning with her food intake, but it was really nice for her to be able to see on the images how much her body really has healed. We live in a world of immediate gratification. And to think about having to wait a month or two, or even longer for something as simple as being able to eat a Popsicle is just unfathomable. But, as we said before, the Lord has his own time schedule. His objective is not about making things happen right now, He's just going to make it happen right. So, mom seems OK with this news. Spending all day at the doctor's office and hospital, being poked and prodded wore her out again. But, she is in good spirits. All will be well in good time.

Not sure why

Mom's new feeding tube is working like a charm. No more clogs. She has been uncomfortable at the tube site, especially where her new stitches are. The pain makes it hard to relax. This morning, she was again nauseated and vomited quite a lot. We had been blaming the Carafate (medication) for the nausea, but it continues to be a problem even without the medication. She continued to throw up small amounts throughout the day, reverting back to the feeling of being full rather than nauseated. We're just not sure why this keeps happening. We talked about the need to sit upright (at a 90 degree angle) for 45 minutes to an hour after eating. She has forgotten to do this so we'll be trying that tomorrow. She will also be calling Dr. Ott tomorrow for her biweekly phone visit. Hopefully he'll have some answers.
Mom and dad were able to take a long walk to the park, around the track and back home. She started her feeding tube a little earlier today so she'll be done first thing in the morning rather than having to wait until 10 or 11 am to unhook it.
It's hard to remember that all of this is progress. I think mom wants to measure her recovery by how soon she will have her feeding tube out or when she can eat regular food. It is discouraging to be going at such a slow rate, but the Lord doesn't measure progress by our time limits or even by our measuring stick. Slowly but surely she will be whole again. In His plan, things are made perfect in a perfect way, rarely are they in the method or time frame we think they should be. If we can just have faith and remember the Lord knows what He's doing, He can work miracles within us.

A rough day

The day started with a big clog that just wouldn't go away. Mom normally has 6-7 cans of food in her tube per day. She had had less than 4 when the tube clogged. She finally got into Doctor Ott's office this afternoon. He changed the Prilosec from one to put in the feeding tube to one that she will have to swallow. (We think that was one of the problems with the clogging). He had to give her a local anesthetic and then some stitches to secure the new feeding tube.
Besides being weak from the lack of nutrients, she had a hard time holding her food down today. She threw up quite a bit. Her tummy was really hurting tonight where the stitches are. She went to bed a little earlier tonight. Hopefully she'll get some good rest and be feeling better in the morning.

More foods

Mom has done fairly well with her clear liquids although she has been getting a little nauseated after she takes her Carafate (the medicine that"s supposed to neutralize the bile in her stomach). Yesterday morning after she took it she threw up quite a lot. When she spoke with Dr Ott yesterday, he agreed since the vomiting was from nausea and not because her stomach was overly full, he was going to allow her to start having regular liquids. This means puddings, applesauce, etc. Also, she is to stop the Carafate and see how that does. She had a "Swirl" from Costco (frozen yogurt) but at just a little more than she should have (she's only supposed to have 1/2 cup at a time every two hours). She could feel it for a while and threw up just a little, but it did eventually drain. She drank a little bit of Ensure this morning and is feeling a little nauseous again.
We've been continuing to have problems with her feeding tube getting clogged. After the incident on Saturday, it seems to clog a little but not totally. This morning, however, it got totally clogged. We've done 2 "clog zapper" treatments and it's just not going. We've got a call in to Dr. Ott. My guess is they will have her come in and replace the tube. It has been more than a month since it was placed, so who knows what gunky stuff has accumulated in it.
Other than that, she seems to be doing well.
We got a lot of the test results back from Dad's physical. He is doing fairly well. His cholesterol is a little high, so Dr. Potter is starting him on thyroid medication. It is supposed to help with the cholesterol as well as several other symptoms he's been having. Dr Potter also suggested adding some fish oil and Vitamin B tablets to his diet. His blood sugar was good, but the diabetes test results were a little high (not quite to the diabetes level, but high enough to do something about it). Dr Potter said if dad eats better like he's been doing this past week, he should be fine. We talked about the pain in his leg and they did an ultrasound of his leg to make sure he didn't have blood clots. That came out clean. The next step is to go to the cardiologist and have a full work up done there.

Baby steps

The tube feed clog turned out to be a little more of an ordeal than expected. They provide us with a "clog buster" solution which is supposed to fix it. We put it in waited an hour and tried to flush the tube and nothing. So, we put in another one, and I called the home health service while we waited. They told me, if this didn't work, we would have go to the emergency room and have a new tube inserted. When the hour was up, we said a prayer and started the flush again. It just wasn't budging. Finally, with the last 20 ml of water, it broke thru. We were so grateful, especially cause an emergency room visit would have messed up our day of hair appointments and pedicures! :)
Mom has been able to enjoy 1/2 cup of clear liquids every 2 hours or so. Although, yesterday she attempted to drink 6 oz of juice instead of her doctor's recommended 4 oz. She ended up coughing up the excess. Those darn doctors, why do they always have to be right. So, only 4 oz at a time; Her stomach just can't handle more at this point. She's hoping to get the OK to start regular liquids (as opposed to clear liquids) tomorrow after she talks to Dr Ott . This will mean she can have apple sauce, pudding and ice cream.
She attended church yesterday but it totally wore her out. All in all, things are progressing. The progress is slow and sometimes so minute we don't see it right away, but there is progress.
Dad goes in tomorrow for the 2nd half of his physical. Hopefully most of the test results from last week will be back.

Let the eating begin

Mom spoke with Dr. Ott yesterday. He had really hoped to have her go a whole week (not just 4 days) without throwing up before he let her start some foods. That would be Monday. He said he would compromise and gave her the choice of starting on Saturday or Sunday. Now, for a smart doctor, that was a dumb thing to ask, "do you want to start eating on Saturday or Sunday". Mom just laughed at him and chose Saturday!
Of course, if it's not one thing, it's another. Mom woke up early this morning with her feeding tube clogged. We are in the process of "declogging" it. While she's waiting for the "clog buster" to work, she is sipping on some Capri Sun Berry Breeze 100% juice and seems to be enjoying every minute of it. :)
Dad's physical went ok this week. They took lots of blood tests and Doctor Potter gave him a stern talking to about eating properly. From the doctor's office, mom and dad went to the grocery store and dad stocked up on lots of fresh fruits and vegetables so he can have more healthy meals and snacks. So far I've seen him eating grapes and apples as opposed to ice cream and strudels. Of course he forgot to mention his leg. He has another appointment on Tuesday where hopefully the test results will be back. We'll make a list of things to discuss with the doctor.
Dad is off to his spinning class at the gym this morning and mom is getting ready to start her day; we're getting our hair cut and pedicures today so of course it will be a good day.